There's a Thin Line Between Josh and Zach
by sillykiwi
Summary: Joshua Abrams thought his worst nightmare was when Cameron Morgan broke up with him, but it was actually when Zachary Goode showed up at his father's pharmacy claiming he worked there. /oneshot


**wow, i forgot the line breaks. -slaps self-

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Josh Abrams walked into his fathers pharmacy early Saturday morning, somewhat ready for his morning shift. He went through the usual routine, punch in, grab name tag, and count money in the cash register.

Seeing Zach whatever his last name was, was NOT part of that routine.

"Hey, Jimmy." the arrogant voice said. Josh looked up from the register to see him walk through the front door, that annoying smirk plastered on his face, "Ready for our shift?"

"What are you talking about Za--Zeke?"

Zach spread his arms out. "I work here now. Isn't it great? We have so much in common."

Yeah. They had a girl in common. That was pretty much it.

"Come on Jimbo," Zach said, punching Josh's arm lightly. "This'll be fun."

"That depends on your definition of fun." He mumbled, showing Zach where to punch in and out, then handed him a broom, "You can go sweep outside."

Zach took the broom and saluted him, "Aye, aye, Captain Jimmy!" He turned with a small chuckle and turned, heading for the door.

Josh scowled as he walked out, "It's Josh!" Asshole.

-

"Stop flirting with every single girl who walks into the store," Josh muttered to Zach, who was currently charming the brains out of one of the most prudent girl at Josh's school. Zach ignored him. "Hey- what would Cammie think?" And Josh thought he got him for a moment, until Zach shrugged and said, "Trust me, Cammie knows what I'm doing."

"I'm not sure you know what you're doing," Josh replied.

"Have you met Josh?" Zach asked the girl, tilting his head towards him. "I think he goes to your school." He raised his eyebrows and went to the backroom, leaving Josh to deal with the girl. "She's a virgin," Zach whispered as he passed by.

"I have a girlfriend."

Zach nodded and clapped him on the shoulder, "Yeah, you keep telling yourself that, Jimmy." he glanced around the store for a moment and looked back at him, "Look, I'm not saying anything, but I saw your supposed girlfriend walking around the town with some guy."

"That's her cousin."

Zach tilted his head and looked confused, "Huh, didn't know cousins made out. Must be incest." He shrugged and walked towards the back of the store.

The girl walked up to him as her eyes followed Zach to the back, "Your friends kinda hot."

Josh scoffed and turned around, "Please we're not friends. At all." Because he's an asshole and Josh is the naïve guy who always loses the girl.

-

In the backroom, Zach met up with HIS girlfriend. "Your ex-boyfriend is about as interesting as a brick wall," Zach told her, picking up a carton of pills. "Maybe as interesting as grass growing."

Cammie sighed. "Stop provoking him and he'll return the favor."

"It's not like I have anything nice to say about him. No offense." Zach only added the last part when he saw the look on Cammie's voice. "And I wasn't provoking him with the DeeDee thing. She _was_ making out with that guy."

Cammie sighed again. "Yeah, but you don't tell people that when you're trying to be friends with them."

"Who said I'm trying to be friends with him? _You're_ trying to make me be BFFLs with him."

Cammie smiled at the word "BFFL". It sounded weird coming from Zach. Then she shrugged. "Please do it for me," she asked softly, batting her eyes slowly.

Zach stared at her. "That's mean."

Cammie smiled again. "I'll be waiting for you at the end of your shift."

-

Zach walked out and sighed, handing the girl the pills. After Josh rung her up he said, "Y'know, there's a hot girl checking out the condoms over there," he pointed to a cute raven haired girl glancing at the ecstasy brands, "you should talk to her. Maybe get lucky."

Josh turned and looked at him, "Uh, okay. Thanks, man?" he turned to go talk to the girl before turning around to glance at Zach skeptically, "Why?"

Zach shrugged, "'Cause I kinda have a conscience and I feel slightly bad, because Cammie left you for me," her shook his head, "Nah, I don't feel bad, but she's hot and you seem desperate."

"I have a girlfriend," Josh repeated."And she's cheating on you," Zach replied in the same tone. He pushed Josh from behind the counter. "Just try."

"What do you want me to do?"

"I thought you had a girlfriend."

Josh blinked, confused. "What?"

"What?"

"You just- never mind."

They had reached the condom aisle. Casually, Zach knocked over a couple, somehow making it look like the girl had done it. And then he walked back to the counter, leaving Josh alone.

Again.

Still. The girl was pretty hot.

-

Zach watched from the register as Jimmy hopelessly flirted with the girl. In his comms he heard Grant laughing, "You, my friend are a genius."

Zach laughed, "Spy."

Before anybody else could reply Josh walked back up to the cash register with a few condoms in his hands, "I asked her out." he looked down at his hands, then at Zach, "Should I buy these?"

Zach nodded with a strait face, "Never hurts to be safe, Jimmy boy."

"You know how many unwanted pregnancies occur every year just from unsafe sex alone?" Zach asked. "Or the percent increase in teenaged pregnancies since the 60's? What about condom failure rates?" Josh looked at him oddly. Zach tried to maintain a straight face. "Don't get the thermal ones," Zach finished, looking down at the packets in Josh's hand.

The conversation was quickly growing awkward.

Zach continued on, "And if the condom feels to good, it either broke or slipped off. And just because its flavored, doesn't mean she needs to taste it. Blow jobs are tacky and herpes looks horrible on someone's mouth."

Josh raised his eyebrow, "And you know this how?"

Zach laughed, "How cute, Jimmy. You think I'm a virgin." Zach smirked, then continued. "Texturised ones work out well, but that's just me." And Cammie, Zach added silently. He wasn't that mean. "And Cammie." Okay, maybe he was.

"Don't need to know the details of your sexual relationships," Josh said coldly.

"Have you had any?" Zach asked, sitting on the counter.

"Any what?"

Zach blinked. "Quote, sexual relationships."

Josh blushed, "Uh, maybe. With DeeDee once, after a party. We were both pretty smashed actually. I thought she was Megan Fox at first." He admitted.

Zach snorted, "What were you drinking, wine coolers?" He saw Josh's face and sighed, "At least you like to aim high, Megan Fox is actually really hot. She can't act for shit though."

Josh nodded and added, "And she has that weird thumb. Turnoff." Wait, what the fuck was happening? Were they getting along?

Zach looked just as confused. "Anyway."

"Anyway," Josh echoed.

"Driven any forklifts through walls recently?" Zach asked in a slightly mocking tone.

Josh frowned. "Um. No. Why?"

Zach blinked and frowned too, like he had just said something he wasn't supposed to. "No. Nothing. Nevermind."

Josh coughed and straightened up, "So what's your school like? The Buckhom Institute for Boys or something like that?" Hah! Two can play the purposely forgetting something's game.

Zach shrugged, "Its an all guys school. What do you expect? Half the guys are gay, the other virgins, well, aside from me, but then again, I'm awesome and mysterious."

Josh nodded, "Oh. So, how did you meet Cammie?" Most awkward silence, EVER.

Zach cleared his throat lightly. "Uh, we were in Washington at the same time a few years ago. Her school and my school." He paused. "We were in the elevator together and I offered her some M&M's."

Josh nodded again. He knew Cammie's love for M&M's. Zach tried to flip the question around, "How'd you meet DeeDee?"

Josh answered this question easily. "We've been going to the same school since preschool."

Zach nodded this time. "Ah."

Before the tension in the room could get ANY more awkward, Mr. Abrams walked into the pharmacy with a smile on his face, answering both boys silent prayers, "So, Zach, how was your first day?"

Zach nodded again., "It was good, Josh here helped me out a lot."

Josh stood there in shock, apparently Zach_ did_ know his name. He nodded too, "Yeah, I think Zach'll work just fine here."

Zach nodded, "Right well, I guess its time for me to punch out, correct?" He turned and smirked at Josh, "Cammie's waiting."

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_hellooo, darls. did you enjoy reading josh and zach's male bonding time?_ that sounds like a sexual innuendo so i'll shut up. can you tell it's kiwi? **story recommendation: if you liked this you should read "gives you hell" by vampirexmusic-passion. ** it's pretty epic if we do say so ourselves. right lily? anyhoo, reviews are lovely and v. v. appreciated. _did you like it? what about the title? i thought up that. okay, i kinda got it from gossip girl but i thought up the idea of using it and that should count._

**BASS!**_  
_


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